The Summers Fly, One by One!

I don't update too incredibly often during the summertime. It's almost over though... Lots to do still here in Provo before the school year begins.
I do spend a lot of time with my family. In fact, my little squirrel sister is here for the upcoming year at BYU! Hooorah! I can now mooch off of her Diner's Plus! Also, my parents are here, and when they come to town, we always do lots of fun things like watch Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamboat (SHONI!). You know, I still remember all the words of that silliness... and it's probably been eight or nine years since I last listened to the soundtrack. Seriously, word for word! I am a human juke box! I also am living with my sister and brother-in-law, this being that transitional period in between apartments. Come Wednesday, I'll be in a house. Who knows what to expect there? People often tell me that it makes it more difficult socially...
Sooo, up comes the semester. What do I expect? Well, you ain't gonna find out! I don't want to tell everyone my goals because then they get their hopes up and stuff. They usually don't happen anyways if I tell people about them. I do not boast in my own strength.
These are for certain:
I am writing a story on the Mountain West Conference for the Daily Universe that will print the first Friday of school. Nothin' big really, just a start.
I do have an interview with Orem Fitness tomorrow to ref flag football again. Yep, reffing again. WHAT THE H-E-DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS ARE YOU THINKING!!?
I do have lots of fake teeth. One of them is getting replaced tomorrow. That's when they shoot your gums with needles and it makes you cry no matter what. Or maybe I'm just a sissy.
Then again, I do donate plasma twice a week. I'm not scared of needles. They just hurt significantly more when shot in your gums than in your arm. The new plasma clinic shows good movies too, like Mulan, Kung Fu Panda, and Heavyweights.
I am going to school only part time this semester. Any more credit hours I have beyond the two classes required for application to the Communications program count against me in said application.
Cheat Commandos make me giggle.
What is NOT for certain:
GRADUATION! I can project sometime in the next two years (being done with generals and all), but you never know. I might up and switch majors again...

So, I am excited!
Until next post, what are your thoughts on pleated pants?

efy: The Summer of Some Consequence

For so long, the blog has been silent... some of you may think that there is nothing happening in my silly summer life. At this moment, you would be correct to assume as much. But before...

So on Saturday last week, I retired the bright green and salmon polos and kahki pants for the summer of 2009. As is typical for one like me, I feel it's time to reflect on the six weeks of dancing, yelling, screaming, singing, slapping, napping, clapping, spazzing, smiling, laughing, crying, eating, sitting, stressing, and pretty much floating on this surreal feeling of being someone during my lazy summer days.

Totalling it all up between 'Steady and Sure' and 'Be Thou an Example', I've now been counselor to over 100 young men, from Texas to Utah to Canada to Australia and some odd places in between. I've had 18 co-counselors, 2 brethren and 16 sisters. Apart from my co's, I've gotten a grand total of two numbers and zero dates... thus far. This year I dealt with slight autism, depression, bad roommate mojo, A.D.D., A.D.H.D., ninjas, and pot, among other things (and I'm not just talking about myself)... snicker. Through all this, I am continually amazed at how small this Mormon world is and how it continues to shrink! For instance, this last week in Provo I had a youth from my home stake in Texas... well, he doesn't live there anymore, but if anyone knows the Bassetts, let them know that Redford should have a weeklong timeout for kicking his counselor and almost getting him busted for late-night Wendy's. I also saw many of my participants from last year, and even had one in my company for the SECOND TIME! What are the odds? Poor kid... he went to Provo the first year and then San Antonio the second to try and escape me. He was also shorter than me last year and this year he had about half a foot on me.

I don't plan on making another narcissistic slide show this year, but I did manage to get pictures with all of my boys and most of my co's (except week 4) and they will soon be posted on Facebook. For now, I am reconstructing my vagabond life and trying to find my niche in Provo again. I did get an inside connection to the Daily Universe... you never know.

Provo 1A: After the Trial
Highlights of this week: One of my youth pulling a butt muscle during a small game of football, my Samoan youth trying to down an entire Martinelli and losing it in a similar way to a baby's spit-up, and another of my youth calling one of my co's up during the variety show to be serenaded by his version of 'Fly Me to the Moon'--so smooth.

Provo 3A: Night of Darkness
Highlights: Apart from Cannon center dining, there was the bonus of a free-time company volleyball game, the notorious Plunger man banging on everyone's door (looking for his shampoo while only wearing a loin-cloth), and dancing with a really cute counselor that I probably will never see again... sigh...

Provo 4A: Tell You All Things
This was a particularly small group. I only had six boys, and the only reason I was working this week was because I inherited it from another counselor who could not. Lots of walking, lots of this silly game called 'Birdman', a participant who eerily resembled a young version of Barrack Obama, and a co-counselor who knew how to social dance. Too bad they never play counselor dance cha-cha's.

San Antonio 2: Seek Ye
Lowlights of this week: A pothead. Everything else was great though. I really do think I enjoy the San Antonio EFY's more than the Provo ones, because the kids here don't come from schools surrounded by a thousand mormons, so it means a bit more to them to be in this kind of environment. Plus the memories of seven some odd years ago when I was an awkward youth...
I also had my first black youth this week. I feel so complete as a counselor (though I would like an Asian)!

San Antonio 3: Cannot Fall
Highlights: Painting the fingernails with 'EFY', line dancing to N-Sync (the video is on Facebook), and retaining my manhood the whole time.

Provo 10B: Sent Forth By Power
Highlights: Introducing the Power Ranger theme which carried pretty much the whole week, busting some ninjas late Wednesday night (and I quote them: "Ninja disappear!"), and becoming the best counselor in the world with a late night delivery from Wendy's to my boys. Then again, Saturday morning breakfast I could just hear Captain Jack Sparrow saying to me, "In case you were waiting for the opportune moment... that was it".

Ya, I know... a lot of long stories condensced into smaller inside jokes. Hey, if I ever see you in person, I can let you know all about it if you have the time--like twenty some odd hours.
Disclaimer: The author is not a pothead.

Tribute to an Old Friend

Many weeks have come and gone, and yet there is still no writings on EFY this year. Trust me, they are coming. The weeks have certainly not been without incidents....

On this day, Wednesday of 7-8-09, the Martin family witnessed the end to another era in this now quiet house deep in the swamps of Texas. I personally watched as my good friend of 18 years breathed his last breath today. For quite a while he had been on the decline, suffering blindness and near deafness, as well as labored breathing due to a struggling heart which in turn complicated things for his lungs and that in turn did not supply his brain with enough oxygen to the point where it would go into periods of shut down, leaving him temporarily comatose and always disoriented. As a family, we had decided that it was time.

It's strange how it seems that not too long ago we laid to rest our dear sister, and though this instance we did not say good-bye to an actual family member, it's about as close as you get. Even so, at that time when Ally left us, shortly thereafter we celebrated the birth of new life in my niece Elizabeth, and now we celebrate new life in that great nuisance of a kitten running amuck now. Timing...

Good-bye Fang. You were not the best of cats, but you were the best of friends. I was with you until the very end, and I hope you'll remember that someday when we meet again.

Back In Texas... for the Third Time this Summer

Ahhh, the fireworks, the giant LCD screens, the muggy air, and the smell and sounds of alcohol. Must be an Astros game! And in case you are wondering what alcohol sounds like: "Hey you! What you doin after the game? Strippers and steroids?!"

This was a tight one too: Wandy vs. Verlander, down to the eighth, and the tying run just walked home... Tejada gets the go-ahead run in with a sac fly to right field, just feet away from where we are sitting!

Of course, the Stro's are almost at the bottom of their division, so playing the Tigers, this game has relatively little consequence. This has been an all around BAD year for sports. Well, any year that the Lakers win a championship is a bad year. The triumph of ego over sportsmanship.

Anyways, I am back in Texas now. I just flew home for the third time this summer. Currently, I am blogging, but tomorrow I head out to San Antonio to work my fourth session of EFY this summer in San Antonio... not my fourth IN San Antonio, like my fourth session of EFY overall. My previous three were in Provo. Someday maybe I will write about those weeks.

So I walk out of the airport this past Thursday and my first impression was that I was standing in the exhaust of some overheating vehicle. Turns out it was just 100 degrees outside... literally. Add the humidity and this place feels like a different hemisphere than Utah (and people were complaining about how hot 76 was up there!). It could be worse... I could be walking around outside all day in long pants and a polo with complaining kids. Wait...

So, apart from the wonder of global warming (which is apparently a taxable threat now), I am enjoying going back country! Look at them boots, a new kind of suit, and back to my roots! It's a song.

The End of Temporary Insanity

So, for the last three weeks or so, I've been chillin in Texas just doing work for my pops. Ha, chillin... ya right. Ain't nothin chill about this state. Just a lot of... sweatiness...

In fact, as soon as he walks in this room, I will abruptly end this post to go help him turn the shed into his very first man-cave workshop. This is what my dad does for fun. He takes breaks from church work and university work to do yard work. 

So it's been a great stay. After yet another semester of so-so grades, my spirits have been lifted spending time with my family who seems to appreciate me regardless of my utter lack of progress. 

Highlights of the stay in Texas:

1. HOME COOKING! I'm up to 150 lbs! 

2. How sweet it is to be in an environment with other Rockets fans! We celebrated going further than anyone in this world thought we would go, together. And you know what, if the Lakers don't win a championship, their season is a failure. FAILURE! The Rockets already had a successful season. Imagine what would happen if we didn't have so much adversity with player health? We probably wouldn't be as good. 

Anyways, I want Denver to beat the Lakers just to show David Stern that God is still in charge. 

3. I am sporting a sweet stache for May's mustache appreciation theme. Unfortunately, I've got EFY next week and I don't think it'd be a good idea to show up looking like a pedophile. 

4. I went biking at Brazos Bend and almost ran over an alligator on my bike. My nephew is witness to that. 

5. Speaking of nephews, there are always great stories going along with the familiar phrase, "Kids say the darndest things." I was discussing with one of my nephews what a 'swirly' was, and he was like, "I put my finger in the toilet... TODAY!" 

6. Yesterday for Laurel's birthday, we went to Cici's pizza. Today, I can't take enough Immodium. It's funny cause about this time last year as I was driving around Heber City... did I post about that little incident? I hope not.

7. And the BEST part about waking up in Texas is.... oh wait, I gotta get back to work.

I'll be takin the story back to Utah come Saturday. Until then.... I need to change my pants.

Maybe I Am Just Lucky...

We all make our own luck in this life, it's true... but some things just happen. Take my phone for instance: every now and then, it just has its monthly period, where it wigs out and goes upside and backwards, and that's on a good day. Lately, I open it and don't even get a screen, just some purple lines. Yesterday it was upside, backwards, and the color was inverted! Silly phone!
Today I was playing basketball, just a simple pick up game, two on two with my roomies. I was guarding Justin as he drove to the basket, and a crash of drums and a flash of elbow and as good ole Yogi put it, "It's like deja vu all over again!"
My cleaning check for check out is tomorrow. I have job six, which includes the following: vacuum the entire apartment, dust the entire apartment, clean out every storage closet, sweep the patio, wash every window, and wash the doors and walls. Oh yeah, and make sure jobs one through five are done also, which nobody has touched our bathroom yet so I will have to do as well. I have yet to pass a cleaning check on the first go-round here, and this time I don't get a re-check. And the new guy is moving his stuff in, so it's all over the floors. And the fee for failing is much higher on check-outs.
At least school is over, right? And I have a whole summer full of EFY to look forward to because I should get all the weeks I applied for because returning male counselors are few and far between. Oh wait...

I Lost My Optimism Somewhere And I Can't Find It

So my plan for EFY this summer didn't work out when they didn't offer me any more contracts. I have just the one in mid-summer, so I may as well go to school and find a way to apply for the Communications program, which looks pretty dismal considering I am 22 credits over the limit and every one will count against me in the process.
Then again, now the 211 class is full and 239 isn't even offered in the summer. So scrap that plan, I guess I'll just work full time.
I took my books back today from last semester and this one... BYU didn't buy any of them back. So, perhaps I'll have some ceremonial burnings... "I'd like to burn this textbook, I hate this stuff so much!"- It's from a song.
Then I came back to my car after 45 minutes on campus and found a parking citation on it. I thought reading days counted as Saturdays. EXPLETIVE!
So, as minuscule as all these rejections are, I still can't help but be baffled by it all... where did I go wrong? Perhaps it's just time to welcome Murphy into my life with arms wide open, knowing that if there is a possibility today that my pants will catch fire, then they definitely will.

On a positive note, the ward talent show did happen. I was the MC, and the singer for the closing act. It actually went well! This is another reason I'm going to miss my roomies so much.
If you want to see it, just check my facebook account, it's called "The Todd Martin Experience".