Great Workout Music

After 30 seconds, don't worry... it's the same thing for the whole minute and a half.

Surprise Surprise.

The other night I had yet another nightmare of my teeth falling out and me breaking down and crying as a result. Really crying... I felt the sorrow and despair of my dreams, and can still bring that dark feeling to memory.
Now, I find that these dreams are quite prophetic. You guessed it, I was flossing tonight, and I barely applied any pressure and POP goes the bridge! By divine providence, it didn't go down the open drain in the sink.
Some of you may say that I need a new dentist, and my luck is as bad as Jon's. I would disagree on both accounts. I think they just like me so much in that office that they rig my dental work to insure I will return every few weeks or so. He puts it back in for free anyways.
Missing a bridge, however, is missing two of my front teeth, and it's even more hideous than before. The bright side is that I can put it back in and it stays pretty solid as long as I'm not eating... or flossing. So much for those lunch dates for this weekend!
Dear reader, do you want me to post a picture? It's pretty hideous!

If Only Life was Like the Movies...

I celebrate this my 150th post by eating a frosty. I think I am ready to rank frosties up there with lemon-scented dishwasher soap and cucumber ranch and muppets.
Now my frosty is gone and I am sad.

If only life was like the movies...
I could live in Willy Wonka's chocolate factory and have these cups that were magically enhanced to never run out of frosty. Pure imagination...

If only life was like the movies...
Arguments would end with some table-turning decisive comment or point, and the victor (me) would walk triumphantly away with ensuing awe at my awesomeness. Nope, people are just too bone-headed, especially on the basketball court.

If only life was like the movies...
All these girls would have a strong and secret admiration for the quiet nice guy, despite his obvious disadvantages. Nope, girls only like the cocky tools who consistently put themselves in the spotlight.

If only life was like the movies...
Then I would know that after a $130 traffic citation, a dwindling banking account, and miserable grades, everything would turn out with a smashing happy ending. But life provides no such guarantees. Albeit I am a happy person, some things would be nice to be different.

If only life was like the movies...
I could have a T-shirt with the word Pants on it. If only....

After 150 episodes, NCIS still has climbing ratings. I feel that my blog actually has less readership at this 150th post, but that's ok. You are reading this post right now, and that's what matters. I hope it makes your day better, and you can look in the mirror and say, "Gosh darn it, people like you!"

Book of The Man of Little Consequence

Chapter 6:

1. And it came to pass that the man of little consequence did return to his former employ like a dog to his vomit or a cat to his undigested hairball.
2. And the people did rail against him, and did mock him, and did spat upon him, and did threaten him.
3. Yea, the spatting was indeed an exaggeration, for what meaneth it to 'spat' anyways?
4. Nevertheless he did go forth with confidence, and despite the tauntings and stiffneckedness, the hours seemed to him but only a fewer amount of hours for the joy he had.
5. For he did lie in his mind so many times that he came to believe that the work of an official was indeed tolerable.
6. Thus we learn from the man of little consequence that if thou shalt act enthusiastic, than thou shalt be enthusiastic! Eventually...

7. Now in the sixth semester since the great journey to the land of vanity and pride (or as some would say, California), the man did take a stick and began to study it.
8. And the truth of which end was shorter yet eluded him, for it seemed that the cubits from one end to the other were equal, regardless of which end he started from.
9. And the question remained, and all his studyings of math were in vain.

10. And it came to pass again that the man of little consequence did revel in cliches, such as the beginning of this verse.
11. And for all his prosperity in schooling and work, he was yet of a sad countenance.
12. And his roommates wondered what it was that caused his countenance to fall, and he answered them in poetic lament:
13. "For all the riches and knowledge of this world are but emptiness to me, and are nought save for the one woman who will esteem me as greater than a little consequence,
14. "And as of yet, they are all either non-existant or undesirable."
15. And his roommates did berate him, saying:
16. "For thy shallowness, thou shalt be cursed above all the single men in the land,
17. "On the hands and knees shalt thou go, and in the bushes shalt thou hide all the remainder of thy days in the land of a thousand talents.
18. "And thou shalt wont only for what thou canst not have, and forever be as a man who dreameth and drinketh water in his dreams, but awakens and is yet parched, or as a man who eateth lasagna in his dreams and awaketh only to remember he is a lowly and impovershed college student."

19. And the man knew that they had not authority to curse him, yet the truth was still hard.
20. For this, he knew then that whatever end of the stick was in his hands would be deemed the short end.

*Disclaimer: The views reflected in this particular chapter are mostly fictitious for your enjoyment, and do not reflect the true manner of Todd, which, as you know, is quite perpetually cheerful.

I'll Show You Tough!

Don't show up drunk to auditions

You Win Some, You Lose Some

So, yesterday was full of disappointments... I got a citation for running a stop sign, and then found out my insurance was expired. On the bright side, I only got warnings for the insurance and my rear brake light being out.
Today was even better though! Remember that C-? I got it fixed! Oh blessed university, for once you cut me some slack.
Then tonight, it was back to the whistle and stripes. Oh, how I have forgotten the excitement I feel for every reffing game. Because I ended the sentence with a period and not an exclamation, you might realize that it was a sarcastic statement.
So I'm back now, settling down and getting ready for a gang of reading, but ultimately feeling like I really lost by the end of the day.
That's life, especially the life of a regular guy like me. You win some, you lose some.

Crazy Dreams

I had this crazy dream last night that I was reffing a college football game. I was in the referee position, which is the one about ten yards behind the offensive line, and I was having problems staying awake. In fact, I fell asleep a number of times, and my other much older fellow officials were teasing me for it. I also did not have my contacts in so I couldn't see anything, and I was wearing cowboy boots, which I was sure was not helping my professionalism. I remember thinking, "Wow, I am a joke right now... but I am reffing a college game, and it's gonna look great on my resume!"
So, Mr. Freud, tell me what I'm supposed to get from this?

Number Crunching Time

409 divided by 582 is .7027... yadda yadda yadda.
Now add 129.4 points to 409. That makes 538.4.
Divide 538.4 by 582 and you get .9250... yadda yadda yadda.

So, what's up with the nunbers Einstein? Well, let's take a look at what they represent, shall we class?

409 is the total amount of points awarded to Todd Martin for his Media Writing class last semester. The total points possible for that class is 582. Thus, his numerical grade was, you guessed it, 70.3%.

Upon further inspection of Blackboard's recordings of said grades, Todd Martin found that eight assignments were not recorded, so the points remained at zero. Of these eight assignments, 35 of those points were basically attendance points, and would have been awarded full credit. The other one hundred points were the four unrecorded lab assignments. Assuming Todd Martin made his average points on these 25 point assignments each (the average being 23.6 based on the other 7 lab grads), that would total 94.4 points total. Add the 35 given points, and that represents the 129.4, which would then bring Todd Martin's total earned points up to 538.4. What then, would be the difference if the faculty had not overlooked these assignments?

The answer is 22.2% total of the numerical grade. Instead of a 70% (C-), Todd Martin would have scored 92.5% (A-), since the class is not curved.

That's the difference between applying to the Communications program this semester and applying in September. That's the difference between at least two more semesters of tuition.

And I know what you're thinking now, "Todd, are you sure you did these assignments?" The answer is unequivocally YES!! I didn't miss any of these classes at all last semester, and I turned in every lab assignment in lab! Maybe, just maybe, I didn't turn in the active voice worksheet after I did it, but that's only 15 points. If every 5.82 points is 1% of the grade, that would have dropped me from the assumed 92% to 89%... a B+.

Now you're thinking, "Well, it's your responsibility to check your grades and alert the professor to anything missing." And you would be right to think so. Despite him having announced several times that he was aware that there were missing grades on blackboard and he was taking care of it, I still dropped the ball when I neglected to check my grades every day before Christmas and complain to him every day that they still were'nt there.

Perhaps now you see why I want to do my angry dance to class every day!

Of course, I did make a B- in Comms 101 two semesters ago. They won't even look at any application that has grades less than a B in that class, so I have to retake it anyways. So I won't apply til September anyways. So what in TARNATIONS am I making a case for, right?? RiGHT?
BUTTERFRICKLE!

Welcome to Walden's Pond

How come my imagination is so much cooler than this world? I'm going to spend a lot more time there this semester.