Hangin Out With Smeagol

I took my last final today. You know, I did really well of finals this year. If only I would stop forgetting to turn in really important assignments...
Ha, "It's not my fault, I forgot!" That was my excuse for everything growing up. Sometimes it was true.
Anyways, on the tests that I know about, I got an 88 and an 84. I tried so hard to get an A on either one!!! I seriously don't think I've gotten an A on a test since I last took a religion class. I'm just not meant for this school thing. Maybe I should just learn a trade, like welding or croquet.
Two blind dates this week. Both named Melissa. Coincidence? I think so...
So now I have all this time on my hands and nothing to do... I could pack or clean my car, but that'll get old real quick.
What I'm tryin to say, I guess, is "I think I'm ready for another adventure!"

Reflections of a Retired Official... Again!

Well, Tuesday marked my last day of work. I only had one hour, and I reffed the Division 3 men's championship where one of my former bishopric member's went home with a t-shirt.
And so it was... until Fall comes around.
Now we look back on the good times of the year... and then I say to myself, "Wow, I've already blogged so much about the funny/interesting/annoying stuff of officiating this year that I've got nothing else to say!"
Except this: Last Wednesday I had a full-blown reconciliation meeting with the guys who followed me home. I went with the intention of getting the meeting over with as soon as possible and delivering the message that I really held nothing against them for their one act of thoughtless impulsiveness. I let this be known pretty much right away in our little get together, but the fellow running the whole business (an old, mellow gentleman who gets paid to be old and mellow) had a much longer process in mind... a much longer and much more official process.
So the guys issued formal apologies, and very sincere I might add. At least, it felt sincere. I told them that I had much worse on my mission, and as long as they weren't Lakers fans, they were already forgiven. (They were from California, but they were not on the dark side... in fact they were anti-Jazz fans!) Whatever they did didn't matter anymore, except for the suspensions they have to fill come Fall semester. And now it's all over, and they will be ever more respectful and keep cooler heads during their games. We could use more players like them.
I've always thought that you can tell a lot about a man by his actions on the basketball court. Exercising self-control to the degree of keeping your temper and irrationality in check while still having a competitive edge is one of the highest degrees of self-mastery, in my opinion. That's why girls are so much more spiritual than guys. I mean, how often do you see one of them resort to absolute carnality in the heat of a basketball game?
You can quote me on that one.
Ultimately, this year with the stripes has been surprisingly rewarding. As much as I complain and share the stories of the bad ones, there were a whole lot of good ones who told us, "Hey, you guys did a good job." And we always did a good job. This growing multitude of generally good guys is joined by the losing team of the Division 3 championship (as well as the winning team, I reffed them about abigilion times and they rarely complained), and by my three new friends on Facebook, two of which were riding in a Blue Sedan a few weeks ago.

Warm fuzzies all around!!!

Win Much?

You know, if it wasn't for Crash Team Racing, my nephews, or games of 21 no-tips with Colin and Justin, I'd think I never win at anything!
Take a look at my fantasy team. I only lost twice during the regular season, and the second loss was because I didn't sub anyone in. Now here I am, ousted in the first round. For the record, I placed Kevin Durant at my number two draft pick because I had a feeling (that's higher than any player except Lebron James). I also made all the right moves during the regular season, acquiring Chris Anderson and Jamal Crawford, and holding onto a hurt Ginobli. Then I made all the wrong moves in the post-season, like not sticking with Roy Hibbert and Beno Udrih. And Baron Davis up and gets hurt too...
So brag all you want, Jonny Bravo. The game is all luck, and you got lucky.
Then my volleyball team for my volleyball class. We keep getting ahead, then choking away five or ten point leads. I think it's me. I am a virus. Whatever team I am on doesn't do well. I mean, look at my high school and intramural record! (My intramural record, between 4 seasons of basketball, 2 of football, 1 of soccer, and 1 of water polo, is about 5 wins and however many losses the rest of those games constitute... which is somewhere in the vicinity of 50). Oh yeah, add one loss for the one game of Ultimate I played on Ziggy's team.
Well, what can I say? You know the saying, "You win some, you lose some". In my case it would probably be, "You win some, but you lose a whole lot more than 'some' ".

I'm Just Free-Stylin'

The other night a kid called me the "worst official ever". I don't believe him. I mean, has he even known all the officials ever? I doubt it... And then I got a written apology from the drive-by offenders. Last thing I'm gonna say about officiating here...

So I spent the weekend with my favorite Pumbel Penguin, and then I get to again for General Conference. Always something to look forward to! I also slept through two of my classes because my alarm went off, and I convinced myself to stay a few more minutes, when all of the sudden I was on an airplane, headed to somewhere in Utah, and because of some kid's handicap we had to land on the high-way and taxi to our destination, which was gonna take a really long time because the pilots had to get out and wipe the snow off the windshield numerous times. I was sleeping pretty nicely because I had lots of room, the two seats next to me were vacant at the moment, but some black kids behind me put ice on my head, so I looked at J.B. next to me and he shrugged and said, "I don't know. It could happen." Then I woke up and it was 8:40. I missed my first two classes. Bummer.
But I did get to eat some Crispix for breakfast! I LOVE CRISPIX!!

Message to the Man in the Blue Sedan

At the end of a seemingly uneventful shift on Saturday morning, I was driving home. Someone honked. I looked in my rear view mirror and noticed a blue sedan with two guys in it. No big deal, the honk must have been directed at someone else... As I am walking up to my door, I hear a very loud and long car horn, and turn around to see that same blue sedan giving me a drive by birdie with the guy sticking out the front passenger window yelling a certain p-word I will not repeat here. Let's just say of both of the times I have been called names after the game, the antagonizers are surprisingly consistent with their choice of words.
I reported them, of course. Following me home is a type of threatening behavior. I didn't mind the name calling or the birdie so much; it actually took me back to my days in Sacramento.

Following me home though? Come on guys! We even reffed a terribly favorable game for you (and yet you still lost, so I understand why you are upset). A quick technical on the winning team, and eventually fouling out one of their players so they no longer could put 5 on the floor. But still, you had to follow me home. I'll probably be seeing you again sometime soon though. No hard feelings, really.

Oh Happy Day!

I am still a firm believer that there are no bad days. Only days when bad things happen.
I should have known it would have been one of those days when I was dreaming about hanging on the edge of my bed, so I roll to get back on. Turns out I rolled the wrong way. On the bright side, I didn't hit my head on the dresser on my way down!
I was looking forward to our playoff game tonight, but I felt I should check the schedule one last time. Woops... our game was on Tuesday! So much for our season. Who was the genius who misread the schedule in the first place and spread all that false information? Yours truly. On the bright side, we avoided the embarrassment of showing up to a game we weren't invited to, fans and all.
Notre Dame lost. I had them in my final four. On the bright side, go Cougars!
I had a bum ankle and my whistle was sucking all four hours of reffing tonight. On the bright side, it was lady's night, and we didn't throw anybody out!
So, altogether, not a bad day really.

My Life is Regular

Today I asked my friend what sound a cat makes when you step on it. He said "squish". My life is regular.

Today I was half asleep in class as we were watching a movie. I wasn't conscious enough to control my bowels, but I was conscious enough to realize I let one rip really loud, and that people started to laugh around me. I pretended I was still asleep. My life is regular.

Today Donny Osmond's son played piano and sang in our class just because he wanted to. What a tool. My life is regular.

Today I read a bunch of MLIA posts and decided to do some of my own, though only one of these things actually happened today. My life is regular.